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Admin assistants bemoan bully-boss behavior

Some people just aren’t meant to be boss. At least, that’s what you might think after looking at some of the outlandish bullydirectives from bully bosses, according to forum postings on “’s expert blogs.

The editors of asked administrative assistants to weigh in with the craziest things their bosses had ever asked them to do. They expected to hear about killer hours, volatile tempers, and perfectionist demands.

Here are some of the best examples of “other duties as assigned.”

• Inspect the boss’s sandwich every day to make sure it contained no tomatoes;

• Drop off a pet’s stool sample at the vet. “He left the container on my desk while I was having lunch,” wrote the assistant.

• Call around for a used toilet to replace one that had broken in the boss’s rental house. “Uh, do you guys have any used toilets?”

• Send fake rejection letters from universities to the boss’s daughter as a joke.

• Take a Johnny Mathis album cover to the tailor to find material that matched Johnny’s jacket.

• Throw a surprise party for an up-and-coming vice president’s dog.

• Look for “anything suspicious looking,” after someone had called in a bomb threat.

• Stuff tissue between the boss’s upper lip and teeth, after he chipped a tooth and then glued it back together.

• Check the pencils daily to be sure they were sharp enough. “If they weren’t, I was to sharpen them, but only to the correct size for his hand. If he deemed the pencil too small, he would give it back to me and nastily tell me to save it for my children. I had no children.”

• Spray the boss’s bald head with sunscreen.

And just to show how far the admin profession has come, here’s one for old time’s sake:

• “Back in the day, a vice president would walk out of his office and, without a word, set an empty glass on my desk. That meant he wanted a glass of water. And the kitchenette was right next to his office!”


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